Traveling the northwest coast has been amazing. Washington, Oregon, and Northern California are breathtaking. The cliffs, the ocean, the fricking trees! It feels enchanting and has been somewhat healing.
We’ve been placing our Tessa Rocks everywhere along our way. The Golden Gate Bridge, the shores of Oregon, a lemonade stand in Seattle…anywhere we can. Sometimes we’ll leave a random act of kindness card with it and a couple dollars for a newspaper or a load of laundry. Hoping that it makes their day or helps them spread kindness or raise awareness for childhood cancer.
We had some friends of ours leave a Tessa Rock on the shores of Lake Michigan and had different friends of ours find it the next day!
We left a stack of firewood with a kindness card for our camping neighbors in South Dakota. They posted a picture of it on Instagram, and we found out we actually had a friend of a friend in common. Six degrees, people.
People have been leaving us messages about receiving the cards in South Carolina, Michigan, and even Alaska!
I’ve always said that Tessa reminds me of a lotus flower. That something so beautiful can grow through such nastiness. During her journey, she was such a radiant and admirable soul, surrounded by a horrible disease that took her childhood and her innocence. And she persevered with such grace and charisma regardless.
I feel this is just a continuation of that legacy. Through such an awful circumstance as her passing away, this other beautiful entity is created. The cards, the rocks and eventually our nonprofit to donate to finding a cure and helping other families going through this hellish journey. It’s one of the only things I can hold onto that gives me any peace. Knowing that we are finding ANYthing good from this and hanging on to it.
I’ve been looking for signs from her every day. And every day I find SOMEthing. A butterfly, a rainbow, a dragonfly, a song, the sun, the rain, the wind, the clouds, a bird, a dime, a penny, a feather, a rock and most recently- a single piece of gold glitter in a random place. I’ll take whatever I can find. Does it help? Sometimes. Maybe for a couple minutes. Sometimes it triggers the tears and that can feel good. It’s getting the tears to stop that is the tricky part.
Sometimes I feel my heart is starting to heal and other times it seems the grieving is getting harder and harder the longer I am without her. I know it will never be easy. But when does it stop being SO hard.
Our hearts hurt with yours. She is missed all day, every day…always
There is so much to be said about who Tessa gained her perspective on life from. You are an incredible human being, Karin. I feel like I speak for all of us when I say that a single day hasn’t gone by where we haven’t thought of Tessa; of all of you. Tessa succeeded in changing the world and making it so much better than she found it. She changed my life immensely and that’s something I hope trickles down to our girls and the lives they touch. Thank you for allowing us a glimpse into this journey you are on – both the physical and emotional. You are brave and inspiring.
She is everywhere. She will always be everywhere. ?
Safe travels! xo
❤️
Your courage and grace is amazing, Tessa chose the best parents ever for her journey. While the toughest parts are unimaginable, your strength, grace and courage in sharing it has changed our lives forever. Thank you for all of it, sharing your family, your journey, your pain, your grief and your journey. We love you so much, always.
Your family is in my thoughts and prayers. My niece, Maggie, succumbed to this nasty disease at the tender age of 5. This past week would have been her 17th birthday. I wish I could tell you it gets easier, but in 12 years it hasn’t, its barely bareable. Following your story has been both heartwarming and heart wrenching, as it brought back so many things. I pray that you continue to heal as a family and that you continue to share your story.
Love that you are doing this blog. Think of you and your family everyday followed up with a prayer that you are having moments of comfort, peace and joy in your lives through this new journey you’ve been forced to endure. Sincerely and heartfelt, Chris
Tessa is greatly missed . What your doing to honor her is amazing . We all can help be the voice for Tessa. When your ready I have a fundraiser idea. Just inbox me through facebook or email. Sending lots of prayers.
Sherry Brown
Such a beautiful child should always be remembered and her life celebrated. By writing this her journey and her trials are shared eternally as are yours. What a great tribute by a grieving Mother.
You have a gift with words. Beautifully written. You and your continue to be in my prayers.
Unfortunately it never gets easier, it just comes to point that you just learn to live with it. Tessa is going to be missed by many and loved by all ?? have a safe trip and I am sure that Tessa is there with you guys. I know heaven must be beautiful cause he only takes the best ?
Grief is like the tide… it ebbs and it flows. Your grief is as strong as your love for Tessa. We love you!
I love this! I never actually met your beautiful girl, I know your sister and that is how I first learned of this. Tessa was the most amazing little girl, she inspired me all the time and she still does. I have been following your trip and it is just great! Glad you were all able to get away and do this journey, beautiful country to find at least a bit of peace. I will continue to follow this journey of yours. God Bless and take care.
You and your husband are the strongest couple I’ve ever seen. Your love with Tessa and all of the friends that have touched our souls have greatly brought awareness about this ugly cancer and we will find a cure together.
Love always your mailman
Fred Whisnant
You are always in my thoughts! Karen, your words are amazing!!!! Such a gift! Love you guys!!
We all love you and miss you. We’re here, right beside you
Karin, you have such beautiful words! You have a true gift! You , Bobby, Marley, jay and of course, tessa will always remain in my heart and in the hearts of so many!!! We all love you and want you to know we are with you every step of the way!!!!
Thank you for sharing your heart. Blogging can and I’m sure will be a much needed cathartic way to move one step at a time. I think I may get some of Tessa’s cards and use them – thank you for sharing your ways and examples of how you’ve shown kindness. God bless you all!
So beautiful Karin. Thank you for sharing this journey with us. Tessa touched so many lives and she will never truly be gone because of that.
Through your grief you are doing so much to help other people. God bless you.